We have all read that it takes 21 days of repetition to form a new habit. Maybe I’m there now. I’ve been meditating for about 21 days, and here’s what I’m noticing.

• I can sit for 40-45 minutes. I’m not saying sit still. In fact, I shift around a lot. However, I’m starting to feel more and more still physically for that duration.
• I look forward to meditation! I’ve been waking up about an hour earlier in the morning because i look forward to that time alone. The room and the malas drag me out there for an early morning peaceful moment.
• I see 3 dots in a triangle shape when I close my eyes. Every day. Only in the meditation space, that I have noticed. There is no visual stimulus in the space to cause these 3 dots, even in reflection to the eye. This is an interesting consistent thing, and I think I will run and get my eyes checked to make sure my retina isn’t detaching.
• Without opening my eyes, I can sense how far along in counting the mala beads I am. I usually open my eyes to confirm, however.
• My kids feel comfortable coming into my space while I meditate, but they respect my silence and wait to be recognized. I will probably start to just open my arms for them to sit with me and be quiet in the future.
• I am feeling more peaceful and worrying less.

The last item on the list cannot be underestimated. Things cause stress in my day, as they do for everyone. My brand new camera didn’t work when we tested it out and we have our big video shoot next weekend. The day before my organic certification inspection, I realized that I was missing almost 30% of my planting data. The children interrupt me while I’m working for every small need, including a glass of water.

But living with stressful situations is not making me feel as stressed. I am able to pause and reflect without a knee jerk reaction and deal with the events as they are. The camera is still sitting and waiting for return, but the replacement arrived this week. Parts of the planting data were listed in another spreadsheet and I was able to copy some info and edit it without entering it all fresh.

The children are hilarious. Rather than ask their dad when he’s in the same room, they hunt around the house for me to ask me for help. Instead of losing patience with them (my normal routine), I now return them to their father or babysitter for help and remind them that they can do a lot more on their own– get their own drink, put on their own bandaid, find their own lost bear — than they think.

I think the pausing and reflecting thing is very cool. My partner would constantly express concern about my reactionary approach to dealing with the events of a day. He is now noticing that I worry less and take more time to respond when confronted with an issue. I also consult him more about stressful issues. A person recently broke his hand while trying to rescue a 100 lb steel ball artwork in our yard that started rolling down the hill when several children began to play with it. We actually just found out about that. I freaked out and decided to talk to Mike before calling the family. Mike reminded me that we all have insurance for just these sorts of problems and that an event like that should not affect our desire to build a friendship with him for that very reason. Because I called the person AFTER talking to Mike, I had a lovely and loving conversation with the man’s wife, and my son is going over to their house for a play date next week.

So the thing I have to offer in practicing for 21 days is the result of pausing and reflecting before action. It can be a huge blessing for a typical knee-jerker like me.